Day 11: Ask For Very Specific Help | 30-Day Weight Loss-athon
Welcome to Day 11 of the 30-Day Weight Loss-athon.
All tasks in the 30-Day Weight Loss-athon are adapted from the 52 Weight Loss Missions program.
Read the steps first, then take 10 minutes to think about them and take action. Ready?
What You Need:
- Willingness to ask for help.
Step 1
The people closest to you – your family, the friends you see often, your close work associates – can all play a significant part in your weight loss success… or failure.
But the fact that they play a part doesn’t mean you can play the victim or offload your own responsibilities – not in this program, baby!
The onus is on you to ask for what you want in a way that makes it easy for them to support you. Don’t expect them to know what you need. This is frustrating for you and unfair to them.
So our first step today is to explain to a key person or people in your life that you’re focused on getting slimmer and would really like their support.
Keep it brief and don’t over-explain the myriad psychological complexes or childhood dramas that brought you to this place.
Step 2
Next ask for something specific and not too onerous.
For instance, it’s blatantly unfair to ask someone else to take responsibility for getting you to the gym, or keeping you away from chocolate.
Here are some examples of support you may choose to ask for:
- Ask your partner to look after the kids for an hour, 3 nights a week, so you can exercise
- Ask your work colleague if you can go to healthier places for lunch – eg the new salad bar, the sushi place – instead of your usual burger joint
- Ask your friend if you can go for a walk when you have your weekly catch-ups
- Ask your mother to make a yummy fruit salad instead of your favorite dessert every time you visit (but I urge caution when it comes to mothers and food!)
- Ask your boss if you can have fruit for sale instead of only vending machines
- Ask your family to keep their snack food out of the pantry so you don’t see it every time you’re in the kitchen.
Step 3
Accept that not everyone may be able or willing to help you, and you may get some ‘No’s.
That’s fine – once you know where you stand you can evaluate your options. Other people’s support can be a big help, but if you don’t have all the support you’d like, then accept it, and move on with the resources you do have.
Check in!
And you’re done!
Be sure to leave your comment below to check in and stay accountable. If you’re reading this by email or in a reader then please click here to leave your comment.
See you tomorrow!
I have started suggesting to friends that we go for a walk around the lake near our place instead of sitting at a cafe.
we did have a wonderful fruit salad for dessert on Easter that my sister made, instead of pies or cakes.
Since I’m home by myself from 8am – 3pm there is no one keeping me from exercising, except Mother Nature today because it’s snowing/raining outside. Thank goodness for exercise on the Wii!
I’ve already mentioned several ways to hubby how he can help…he has yet to do any of them other than give me some time last night to go work out (not much inconvenience for him playing xbox while kids are in bed ;).
I have wonderful family and friends, willing to help…it is I, that have a problem, staying committed! But I am making progress, in that direction! <3 : ).
Asked my husband to come home a few minutes earlier, so we could get dinner over with a bit sooner, and I can have time to go for a walk in the evenings before having to be home to get the kiddos into bed.
My boss orders pizza at the end of every month. Several months ago, we asked if he would order salad too and he now does it every month. I usually take my salad bowl and fill up. If I have pizza, I have ONE piece and savor it. What I can do is ask my roommates to put the baked goods away in the cupboard when they make them.
At home, I’m having a difficult time being specific, but I am working on it. Good thing is I make majority of the food decisions, and I work out during lunch. Thankfully, I’m surrounded by so many people at work that are healthy or are striving to be.
I started to slip and instead of wearing my lab coat had put on my judges coat and was getting down on myself for doing some emotional eating yesterday and not excersing and now that I look back I realize what was going on and how to try and avoid that. So I have asked my husband to ask me if have exercised to keep me accountable since I made a commitment to myself to excercise. Most importantly asked myself to commit to stick it out!
I have a friend who I have already confided in and we walk together a few times a week, she just had a baby so in the coming weeks I’m sure we will up our exercise routine!
I have three healthy, active sons who serve as a great excuse for me to keep all kinds of treats in the house. BUT, we have moved to having me make a dessert only once a week, and for other snacks, I try to shop according to what they like, and I don’t! (seriously–Flaming Hot Cheetos are disgusting…)
My husband is and friends are very supportive, one friend heard I was working to get more active and has offered to watch my daughter while I run. I’m surrounded by a good crew so I’ve already taken people up for a good workout.
I’ve asked my sister NOT to buy me coffee when she comes over. I will continue to think of helpful and specific requests to make of my support system. This is a really good tip/mission. Thank you.
I have two types of people in my life: “don’t be silly Mom you don’t need to lose to weight, you’re perfect the way you are” and the one who criticizes EVERYTHING I put in my mouth”. Neither attitude is supportive, I will just keep this one to myself and be my own cheerleader.
I am lucky that my husband will eat anything that I make for dinner as long as he does not have to cook. Even if it is healthy. And my sister is doing this challenge so we support each other all the time.
Most restaurants will also accommodate your requests to reduce calories of their specialty dishes. I have no problem asking for items to be grilled without added oils, salts/sugars.
I have a “buddy”. When we get tempted, we text, or call, and talk through the craving. We share anything new we’ve tried to eat healthy to change our habits. It helps to have someone I the same boat giving support.
I had already asked for my housemates to please not offer me any calorific snacks as I might not have the will power to say No. ( we all have separate shelves in the pantry and mine is at eye level so I can ignore everyone else’s quite easily).
And when I get asked to dinner at someone’s home, I usually have to mention my lactose intolerance in terms of menu options so I might also take the opportunity to also ask for a healthier dessert option ( if they are good friends).
I have asked my husband to help with watching my daughter so I can go to the gym if I don’t get there while she is in school. We have also agreed to take walks together since the weather has gotten nicer. He has already changed some of the things he eats to help keep the ‘junk food” out of the house.
I already did this one yesterday by asking my husband to keep his junk food hidden. I know where my chocolate is but have resisted and after being at my daughters today, with a fridge full of chocolate and my favourite mint slices and a macca’s stop for the grandchild for lunch, I am proud to say I went to a healthy sandwich and vege juice bar for mine and left all the chocolate and biscuits alone. late home tonight and have cooked veges in the microwave and brought a cooked chook.